My sensitive soul has encountered the concept of death and it has been a challenging week. Call it a rite of passage. After coming across a dead squirrel, a dead bird and a dead cricket all in a few days, the questions started coming.
Do all animals die? Do all people die? Do we only die when we are old? Do you die when you get white hair? Are you going to die today? Is Papa going to die? Are we going to die together? Do I have to keep you from dying? What happens to our bodies when we die? Will I have the same face? Will they put your body in the garbage like Uncle Chad put the bird in the garbage? Do I get to keep my necklace? Will you still give me kisses? WHY DO WE HAVE TO DIE?
On and on the questions come and on and on I am faced to really evaluate, "What do I think about death and dying?" While it would be easy to talk about a happy place that we all go where there is lots of candy and toys, I fight the urge. I feel a responsibility to provide simple and honest answers but also feel okay saying, "You know. I don't know the answer to that." What do I know and what can I share? I know that we are more than our bodies. That there is a part of us that lives on with those we love. Call it a spirit. Call it a soul. Call it most simply the love we have shared during our time on earth. I know that I will always be with Ignacio. In the way he treats himself. In the way he treats others. In his laughter and the things that most break his heart. I know that we will never really be apart.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Thursday, September 15, 2011
First Day
Here he is. My preschooler!!!! Froggy lunchbox and Elmo backpack. Please notice the crocodile in his right hand. So Ignacio.
Playing with PlayDoh once we arrived. Emilio sat and the table too. It was kind of his first day too. At least we let him think that.
His cubby!!!
Walking into the building. Here is where I got a little teared up.
Ignacio insisted the boys be matching today. Here they are. They joys and loves of my life. Brother LOVE!!!I woke up to Ignacio two inches from face asking, "Is today my first day of school????!!!!" Yes, indeed it was. After doing circles around the house while I got ready, he finally decided to use his excitement constructively and make a picture for his teacher. A purple whale. By 8:30am we were out the door and I was taking an insane number of pictures while he and Emilio ran circles around each other. He looked so little and yet so big at the same time. Rewind 12 hours and I was sighing as I packed his first lunchbox and wrote him his first love note. And now here he was, jumping out of the car as we arrived at preschool with that same lunchbox in tow. He ran to the top of the stairs in front of his school at put his fist to the air and exclaimed, "Listo para aprender!!! (Ready to Learn!!)" Okay, he's ready.
As we entered the school the energy was high and his teacher was there to greet him. After hanging up his jacket and backpack on his hook we made our way to the all-purpose room where all the parents and kids were gathered. How refreshing to hear a room full of kids speaking Spanish with little gold chains on and parents giving them directions that sounded eerily familiar to the way we instruct in our household. He jumped into PlayDoh and within minutes I felt it was time for me to go. After giving him my "Bendicion" (blessing) I made my way out with Emili0.
There it was. The moment I had been anticipating. The moment that, some days, never seemed would come. How did it feel? It felt natural and perfectly timed. I was ready. He was ready. I just don't know if the world is ready!
L.O.V.E.
Mama Ama with her two boys.
A trip out to the harbor on a beautiful afternoon. The family made our trip so special. From juice boxes to yummy meals it was such a special time.
SPIDER MAN!!!!!!I knew it was going to be a good trip when I looked over to see Mama Ama holding a KitKat out to Emilio and saying, "Grandma...say Grandma." A little bribery never hurt! Within one day she had a sand box in her back room and a smile on her face. Watching my grandma parent my children brings me back to how she parented me. love. leniency. laughter. Ignacio feels a strong connection to her. Just another thing he and I now have in common.
More Manson Memories
So many memories made...Ignacio going down the slide alone, swimming to all the ladders, out to the raft and jumping in alone...sleeping upstairs alone in a bunkbed...the boys playing...the sound of little feet on the dock...the smell of the cottage...screaming at seeing the lake for the first time...eating popcicles...looking at albums...the babies playing...turtle hunting...walks...sunsets...the water...sweet, sweet, memores.
The babies. Need I say more?
What's in that bucket you ask? TURTLES!!!! Here we are after our hunting expedition.
Angel and Chad caught fish with the kids by putting bread in a net and waiting for the fish to come. It worked!
Here is me laying on the dock just one of the nights with a beautiful sunset. I take a picture every night I am at the cottage.
Another naked baby picture in the water at the steps of the cottage. Emilio was a little unsure of the water because it was pretty cold but he went swimming every day to keep up with his brother.
Our first trek into turtle territory. I was hesitant for Angel and I to take a 3 year old and a 1 year old in a canoe but we didn't tip over. Give a kid a net and he really thinks he's doing something!
Every morning we went for a walk to pick up sticks, look for animals and enjoy the silence. First order of business was finding flowers for the Virgin.
The boys spent a good deal of time in the sandbox and, while I don't have very many memories of playing in it, I am sure I was there too at their age. One of the days a toad popped out of the sand as Ignacio was playing. Surprise! Please note Emilio's camera smile. He can do it on cue now.
The babies. Need I say more?
What's in that bucket you ask? TURTLES!!!! Here we are after our hunting expedition.
Angel and Chad caught fish with the kids by putting bread in a net and waiting for the fish to come. It worked!
Here is me laying on the dock just one of the nights with a beautiful sunset. I take a picture every night I am at the cottage.
Another naked baby picture in the water at the steps of the cottage. Emilio was a little unsure of the water because it was pretty cold but he went swimming every day to keep up with his brother.
Our first trek into turtle territory. I was hesitant for Angel and I to take a 3 year old and a 1 year old in a canoe but we didn't tip over. Give a kid a net and he really thinks he's doing something!
Every morning we went for a walk to pick up sticks, look for animals and enjoy the silence. First order of business was finding flowers for the Virgin.
The boys spent a good deal of time in the sandbox and, while I don't have very many memories of playing in it, I am sure I was there too at their age. One of the days a toad popped out of the sand as Ignacio was playing. Surprise! Please note Emilio's camera smile. He can do it on cue now.Thursday, July 21, 2011
Hot and Happy
It has been HOT and HUMID and SUMMMMER! When we walk outside Ignacio always says, "It's a beautiful day." That statement is normally followed up by a secondary commentary such as, "Just a little too windy." Thank you Mr. Forecaster. He has had some interesting questions lately. Let's see if you know the answers.
Are Santa's elves his nephews?
Do penguins fly? If not, then why do they have wings?
Is our neighbor just old or old like Santa?
He keeps me on my toes. He has been testing the limits more lately and we have been riding it like a giant wave but overall we continue to think we should keep him around and not return him to Methodist Hospital.
Emilio is getting so "grown up" and has some hilarious new talents. When he is mad he will cry and scream and then look around the room for something to throw. Then he will go get it and throw it. I try not to laugh but he looks like a little Hulk holding something over his head with all his might only to find satisfaction in it crashing to the ground.
He also thinks he can count. He stands at the edge of the pool (when he hasn't already jumped straight in) with his little index finger in the air and saying, "uhhh...uhhh" (Uhhh is a number by the way) and bends his little knees to bounce with every "uhhh." Oh and he is a tremendous dancer. His little left arm bend and and he moves back and forth. Sometimes he combines this with a dip or a twirl. I wish there was a Dancing With The Stars Baby Edition I could enter him in because I would.
Are Santa's elves his nephews?
Do penguins fly? If not, then why do they have wings?
Is our neighbor just old or old like Santa?
He keeps me on my toes. He has been testing the limits more lately and we have been riding it like a giant wave but overall we continue to think we should keep him around and not return him to Methodist Hospital.
Emilio is getting so "grown up" and has some hilarious new talents. When he is mad he will cry and scream and then look around the room for something to throw. Then he will go get it and throw it. I try not to laugh but he looks like a little Hulk holding something over his head with all his might only to find satisfaction in it crashing to the ground.
He also thinks he can count. He stands at the edge of the pool (when he hasn't already jumped straight in) with his little index finger in the air and saying, "uhhh...uhhh" (Uhhh is a number by the way) and bends his little knees to bounce with every "uhhh." Oh and he is a tremendous dancer. His little left arm bend and and he moves back and forth. Sometimes he combines this with a dip or a twirl. I wish there was a Dancing With The Stars Baby Edition I could enter him in because I would.
Monday, June 27, 2011
The Best Part
Want to know what the best part is? Watching your family love your kids as much as they love you. That is the best part.Summer, Summer, Summer Time
Summer is upon us...Minnesota style. Cloudy, crisp then 90 degrees and sunny the next day. The boys are hilarious at this age. Emilio is totally coming into his own and is proving to be a little clown. Sing a beat and he is off dancing and twirling around. He comes and gives me kisses out of nowhere and will sit in Ignacio's bed and read books alone with his little legs crossed. We just love him so much and can't imagine our family without him. He will do just about everything and anything to get Ignacio's attention. He is quick, smart and ADORABLE. Did I mention he is adorable?
Ignacio is a great big brother and a such a great little person. We very rarely have to discipline him and are always so proud of him ability to see the world and have fun in it. He is always alert to where Emilio is and what he is doing and they are starting to really play together. It is so special to watch them form such a tight relationship all on their own. It makes me think about what it must have been like for my mom to watch it happen between my sister and I. Magic. Ignacio is learning so much so fast. His newest concept is death. He understands that things are no longer just sleeping and is trying to make sense of it. Here is a recent conversation in the pool:
I: If Emilio's face goes in the water he is dead?
Me: Well, he could die if his face stays too long in the water.
I: And then we would have to get a new Emilio?
Me: (Trying not to laugh) No, honey. There is only one Emilio.
Every day we are off to some new adventure and have been biking A LOT!! 25 miles last weekend alone. The two boys sit in the bike trailer and enjoy the scenery, have in-depth conversations or take a nap. The summer has just began but we have already been to art fairs, festivals, the North Shore, auntie's backyard, our swimming pool, picnics, parks, bbqs, beaches on the lakes, the pond and this weekend we are off for our FIRST CAMPING TRIP!!!! Hold your hats for the next blog!!!!!
Ignacio is a great big brother and a such a great little person. We very rarely have to discipline him and are always so proud of him ability to see the world and have fun in it. He is always alert to where Emilio is and what he is doing and they are starting to really play together. It is so special to watch them form such a tight relationship all on their own. It makes me think about what it must have been like for my mom to watch it happen between my sister and I. Magic. Ignacio is learning so much so fast. His newest concept is death. He understands that things are no longer just sleeping and is trying to make sense of it. Here is a recent conversation in the pool:
I: If Emilio's face goes in the water he is dead?
Me: Well, he could die if his face stays too long in the water.
I: And then we would have to get a new Emilio?
Me: (Trying not to laugh) No, honey. There is only one Emilio.
Every day we are off to some new adventure and have been biking A LOT!! 25 miles last weekend alone. The two boys sit in the bike trailer and enjoy the scenery, have in-depth conversations or take a nap. The summer has just began but we have already been to art fairs, festivals, the North Shore, auntie's backyard, our swimming pool, picnics, parks, bbqs, beaches on the lakes, the pond and this weekend we are off for our FIRST CAMPING TRIP!!!! Hold your hats for the next blog!!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)