Let it be...

Today in our living room I had what I feel to be a spiritual moment. As I was doing my morning yoga practice, I found myself moving into child's pose without even thinking or consciously making the choice. It is always a restorative pose for me that makes me feel the most grounded. I'll move myself into child's pose in the file room at work if the spirit moves me and I feel like it's where I need to be after a challenging session. It wasn't until I was in child's pose today that I realized that a song was playing in the background in our house which was the same song I listened to shortly after the first miscarriage. Back in 2012, I sat in my car in an empty parking lot listening to the words of this particular song and feeling the flood of emotions take over me. The sadness, the grief, the overwhelming feeling of loss and despair. Today my body intuitively moved me to child's pose when the same song started playing. As I felt the weight of my forehead against the carpet and allowed my body to relax, I was immediately conscious of the kids playing around me in the living room as I was doing my practice. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and felt an overwhelming feeling of love and gratitude for the noise and chaos and small feet pitter pattering around me at that exact moment. Gratitude for my three beautiful boys and for all that my life has become. All that felt so distant as I sat in my car that cold day in 2012 was suddenly filling my space and my heart today. And I took it all in. All of it. And let it be.